Different Now

There was a moment in my life when I truly thought
I would have drowned in my own tears with your absence.
Not because there would be a hole in my heart,
but because there was this void in my life.

There would be waking moments when no one understood
what I meant when I said, a certain phrase or sat a certain way.
When I have a moment a silence in the middle of a raging crowd.
No one would’ve understood me in those seconds other than you.

That was my biggest mistake in life. Giving you control over me.
Believing no one would give me the time of day to learn me, yet alone love me.

Here I am. Still breathing after the tears ran dry,
not even the same person I was all those years ago.
You wouldn’t even know who I am.
Life is different now.

J. Saunders

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